Gray Divorce: What Florida Couples Over 50 Should Know

Divorce rates among couples over 50 have roughly doubled since 1990, and Florida sees a lot of these “gray divorces” given our large retiree population. If you’re ending a long-term marriage later in life, you’ll face different challenges than younger couples divorcing.

Why Gray Divorce Is Different

When you divorce after decades together, you typically face a more complex financial picture. Retirement accounts have grown over the years. Home equity has built up. Pension benefits may be worth a lot. At the same time, you have less working life ahead to rebuild your savings.

The emotional side is different too. Adult children may have strong opinions. Your social network built over a lifetime may shift. You may find yourself asking who you are outside a marriage that defined much of your adult life.

Retirement Asset Division

Florida follows equitable distribution principles, meaning marital assets are divided fairly but not necessarily equally. For retirement accounts, this requires careful analysis.

What Counts as Marital Property: Only retirement savings accumulated during the marriage are subject to division. If you had $100,000 in a 401(k) before marriage and $400,000 at divorce, the $300,000 growth during marriage is marital property. The original $100,000 typically remains your separate property.

QDROs and Account Division: Employer-sponsored retirement plans like 401(k)s and pensions require a Qualified Domestic Relations Order (QDRO) for proper division. This legal document ensures funds transfer without tax penalties and that your ex-spouse receives their allocated share directly from the plan.

IRAs Are Handled Differently: Traditional and Roth IRAs don’t require QDROs. They can be divided according to the divorce settlement through a direct rollover, avoiding tax consequences if done correctly.

Pension Considerations: Defined benefit pensions can be particularly complex. The present value of future payments must be calculated, and there are multiple ways to structure the division: immediate offset, deferred distribution, or shared payment arrangements.

Alimony in Long-Term Marriages

Florida’s 2023 alimony reforms eliminated permanent alimony, but long-term marriages still receive serious consideration under the durational alimony framework.

For marriages over 20 years, durational alimony can extend up to 75% of the marriage length. If you were married 30 years, support could potentially continue for over 22 years, which may well cover your retirement years.

Courts consider each spouse’s ability to become self-supporting. A spouse who left the workforce decades ago to raise children and support the other’s career may have limited earning potential. Age-related health conditions can also affect employability.

The paying spouse’s retirement plans matter too. Under current law, reasonable retirement can be grounds for modifying or terminating alimony. Advance notice requirements apply, but the law recognizes that indefinite support into retirement years creates hardship.

Healthcare Considerations

If you’ve been covered under your spouse’s employer health insurance, divorce means losing that coverage. This creates urgency around:

• COBRA coverage (expensive and temporary)
• Marketplace insurance options
• Medicare eligibility if you’re 65 or older
• Medicaid possibilities depending on post-divorce income

Health insurance costs can be substantial between divorce and Medicare eligibility. Factor these expenses into settlement negotiations.

Dividing the Family Home

The marital home often represents the largest single asset. Couples typically have three options:

Sell and Split Proceeds: The cleanest solution financially, though it means both spouses must find new housing.

One Spouse Buys Out the Other: Requires refinancing in one name and sufficient equity or other assets to complete the buyout.

Deferred Sale: Sometimes used when market timing matters or to avoid disrupting a spouse’s living situation. The home is sold later with proceeds divided according to the settlement.

Consider whether maintaining a large family home makes sense post-divorce. Property taxes, maintenance, and utilities designed for two incomes may strain a single retirement budget.

Social Security Benefits

If you were married at least 10 years, you may be entitled to Social Security benefits based on your ex-spouse’s work record. This doesn’t reduce your ex’s benefits—it’s an additional option if it provides more than your own work record would.

You must be unmarried, at least 62, and your ex must be eligible for benefits (though they don’t need to be collecting yet). If your own benefit is higher, you’ll receive that instead.

Protecting Your Future

Gray divorce requires you to think carefully about your financial security over what could be a long post-divorce life. Consider:

• Working with a financial advisor who understands divorce implications
• Creating realistic post-divorce budgets
• Understanding tax consequences of various settlement options
• Planning for potential healthcare needs

The decisions you make during divorce proceedings will affect the rest of your life. Taking time to understand your options rather than rushing to finalize typically serves your long-term interests better.